The Mark Of Cain

In the Book of Genesis, the first two sons of Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, get involved in a quarrel regarding their respective sacrifices to God. Cain is so jealous of his brother’s favour with God that he kills Abel and responds to God’s inquiries with the immortal line “Am I my brother’s keeper?” (this strange tale begs the obvious question about why an omniscient being didn’t already know what had happened). As a punishment, God expels Cain from his land and puts a mark on him so no-one will kill him, presumably so that he will have longer to contemplate his crime. You can read this bizarre story in Genesis 4: 1-16 although personally I feel that Hebrew myths have nothing on those of the Ancient Greeks and the Vikings.

 

Like the mark of Cain, I feel that a knighthood is the mark of a crook, a party donor trying to buy respectability or an Establishment shill. Or perhaps all three.

I have written before about the ridiculous ‘honours’ system (here and here) with particular reference to ex-footballer turned annoying micro-celebrity David Beckham. So desperate is Beckham for one of the tawdry baubles dished out of the Establishment that he ranted about Kathrine Jenkins getting an OBE when he didn’t get a knighthood. As I said at the time, Beckham did not object when his pointless and multitalentless wife got an OBE for her nonexistent ‘charity work,’ ie: she wrote a cheque to the right people, so it was a bit rich for him to complain about Jenkins.

 

It was the exposure of the repellant crook Philip Green as using a super-injunction to stop the Daily Telegraph reporting allegations of serial sexual harassment and racial abuse against his staff that prompted this post. Green is one of the more loathsome of the current crop of ‘knights.’ He stole hundreds of millions of pounds from the pension fund of British Home Stores before its collapse in 2015. He was given a knighthood in 2006 by Tony Blair, that well-known friend of crooks and billionaires. Despite his ‘cheeky chappie’ image, Green is not a self-made man and his story is not one of ‘rags to riches’ but ‘riches to even more riches.’ His repugnant narcissism and celebrity-worship has seen him host vulgar parties with the usual type of vacuous celebrities. It will be interesting to see how many of these celebrity ‘friends’ stand by Green in these days of #MeToo.

 

It’s not just Green. Seriously who would want to be a knight these days? As I said above, having ‘sir’ or ‘dame’ before your name simply suggests you are either a crook or an Establishment shill. The number of superannuated singers who have this absurd moniker now is laughable – ‘Sir’ Elton John, ‘Sir’ Rod Stewart, ‘Sir’ Paul McCartney. I wonder what the rebellious anti-Establishment lead singer of the 1960s Rolling Stones would think of  ‘Sir’ Mick Jagger?

 

The current fashion for Tesco knighthoods – two for one – is another mystery to me. If you have an Olympic gold medal you are the top person in your field, you don’t need one of these Establishment trinkets too – that you I’m talking to ‘Sir’ Mo, ‘Dame’ Jessica and ‘Sir’ Steve. Similarly, a yellow jersey from the Tour de France or winning Wimbledon does not need acknowledgment from the chinless wonders at Buckingham Palace, does it ‘Sir’ Bradley and ‘Sir’ Andy? The latter is particularly laughable. It always amuses me when passionate supporters of the SNP accept ‘honours’ from the English monarchy they affect to despise. Isn’t that right, ‘Sir’ Sean?

 

Most of these ‘honours’ given to sportsmen and ‘celebrities’ are designed to convince the ovine plebs that the Establishment are not keeping the lion’s share of ‘honours’ to themselves. There is an episode of ‘Yes, Prime Minister’ where Sir Humphrey Appleby is attempting to justify a big pay rise for civil servants. The Prime Minister’s chief aide remarks that civil servants get honours as well as index-linked pensions and perhaps they should choose one or the other. She asks “What do you think, Sir Humphrey – or will you be Mr Appleby?” Just remember that next time you watch the news and a senior police officer, general, senior civil servant or university vice-chancellor is interviewed. Knighthoods are not awarded on merit, they are a sign of membership of, and the approval of, the Establishment.

 

I just like to end by responding in advance to anyone who accuses me of being mean-spirited and/or having a chip on my shoulder. The answer to both accusations is “yes, absolutely, 100%.”