Joke Of The Day #46

What happens when you mix human DNA with goat DNA?

Joke Of The Day #45

What four words begin the path to spiritual peace?

Joke Of The Day #44

What crime has been committed here?

Joke Of The Day #43

How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Joke Of The Day #42

Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I earn.

Joke Of The Day #41

What’s worse than waking up at a party and finding a cock drawn on your face?

Joke Of The Day #40

A bloke goes up to a woman in a bar.

Joke Of The Day #39

Joke Of The Day #38

A boy was in the bath with his mother.

Joke Of The Day #37

A childish joke for your Friday…

I went went to the zoo.

Joke Of The Day #36

A visual joke…

Joke Of The Day #35

Think about it…

A Roman goes into a bar.

Joke Of The Day #34

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful queen with large breasts.

Joke Of The Day #32

A historian and a sociologist go camping.

Joke Of The Day #31

A joke that wouldn’t have made sense up until a couple of years ago…

An excited couple who are expecting their first child visit the doctor after the first scan.

Joke Of The Day #30

A blasphemous joke for Good Friday.

What were Jesus’ last words before he died?

Joke Of The Day #29

Wish me luck!

I have a meeting at the bank later that should solve all my money worries for good.

Joke Of The Day #28

I saw a girl crying, so I asked her “Where are your parents?” and she started crying even more.

Joke Of The Day #27

A dirty joke…

Why is your girlfriend like your swimming pool?

Joke Of The Day #26

A dirty joke for your Wednesday…

Why is Tinder like Zoopla?

Joke Of The Day #23

A misanthropic joke for your Wednesday.

First person: What pisses you off?

Joke Of The Day #22

A variation on the old chicken crossing the road joke…

Why did the feminst cross the road?

Joke Of The Day #21

What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?

Joke Of The Day #20

A man said to his wife “I have a problem at work.”

Joke Of The Day #19

My wife and I were discussing the name of our unborn daughter.

Joke Of the Day #18

A man went to a wizard and asked him to lift a lifelong curse that had been placed on him.

Joke Of The Day #17

My wife told me sex is better on holidays.

Joke Of The Day #16

A dark joke for your Friday…

My therapist said I should write letters to all the people I hate and then burn them.

Joke Of The Day #15

This is an extremely dark joke. Apparently Elie Wiesel, a Romanian-born American writer, professor, Holocaust survivor and Nobel Peace Prize winner used to tell it to horrified listeners…

A Jewish man meets God upon dying.

Joke Of The Day #1 Update

Original post: Joke of the Day #1

I’ve updated this joke to fit in with current events…

A rich man, a white man and a black man walk into a pub.

Joke Of The Day #14

Definition: ‘Politics’

Joke Of The Day #13

Why did the tyrannosaurus die of Covid19?

Joke Of The Day #12

A man walks into his house and asks his wife what she would do if he won the lottery.

Joke Of The Day #11

A dark joke for your Friday…

Give a man a plane ticket and he’ll fly for one day.

Joke Of the Day #10

In honour of Sam Smith (no, me neither) I’d like to share a quick one liner.

Joke Of The Day #9

How many religious people does it take to change a lightbulb?

Joke Of The Day #8

How do you teach schoolchildren about God?

Joke Of the Day #7

Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, “Don’t do it!” He said, “Nobody loves me.” I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?”

Joke Of The Day #6

I can’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 and 500 in Roman numerals.

Joke Of The Day #5

“You the bomb!”

“No, you the bomb”

Joke Of the Day #4

What’s the difference between a cult and a religion?

Joke Of The Day #3

It doesn’t matter if you are black or white…

Joke Of The Day #2 (Warning ‘Offensive’ Content)

What is the difference between science and religion?

Joke Of The Day #1

A CEO, a worker and an immigrant walk into a bar. They order 20 pints. When the drinks are delivered, the CEO takes one pint from the tray and puts it on the bar. He then takes the rest of the drinks to his table. On his way he says to the worker, “Better be careful that immigrant doesn’t steal your pint.”